Bitter Truth
by YumeTakato
Summary: There was no way to know *when* she'd come to realize Edogawa Conan was Kudo Shinichi, it was just simply something she'd known nearly from the start. (Part 3 of 4 of an unintentional drabble series focused on Sonoko and Shinichi w/ Pt 1 being 'But a Moment' and Pt 2 'In Spite of It all'. This is not a pairing fic, but a character introspection I can't seem to let go of. Save me.)


Sonoko knew.

She wasn't sure _when_ she had realized it, but at some point she had acknowledged the Truth of the matter.

Edogawa Conan was Kudo Shinichi.

It wasn't that it struck her in some fit of stark realization with clues and revelation. The knowledge that that's simply who he was had just... been.

At first, when Ran had introduced the small bespectacled boy she had found his general demeanor (and general disrespect) intolerable. He wasn't endearing or cute at all (despite how Ran felt) and she was simply put out by his now _constant_ presence.

Then the villa happened.

What sort of six-year-old took on a murderer with a messed up ankle?! She'd been terrified, and afterwards when she'd woken up being congratulated for solving the mystery of just _who_ had been out to murder Ran as a witness, she'd been struck silent.

Sure, she'd gone with the flow and came to calling herself Deduction Queen Sonoko with a false bravado, but she _knew_.

Something was very, _very_ wrong.

Slowly, the gap left behind from Shinichi's absence from their walks to and from school were filled in by a boy less than half his size. Slowly, he went from walking with them in annoyed silence to engaging them on the same level or simply observing with a melancholic grin on his face.

It wasn't that she thought Ran _hadn't_ noticed his strange nuances that were far too _Shinichi_ to be rightly excused, it was simply that that was how things had come to _be_. It had become _normal_ for her.

But she knew.

She acknowledged it, despite the times she grabbed him roughly at the scruff of his collar she _**knew** who that boy was without a shadow of a doubt_.

Sometimes, in the middle of the night when she'd have a difficult time sleeping, the things said and done would slowly accumulate and annoy her.

What the hell was he doing, getting himself into those sorts of situations and then living like he was?

Why wasn't he saying anything? Why _couldn't_ he say anything?

Why wouldn't he give Ran more than just _half-baked_ excuses and assurances?

Over time her annoyance with his childish existence pigeon-holed in her life was accepted. He simply became the norm and what _was_. Sure, she unintentionally forgot that he wasn't simply _a child_ , but the physical form he was trapped in could easily make a person _forget_ that there was something _desperately_ wrong with the situation.

The more the murder incidents piled up, the more she stopped getting in his way. She impeded him on occasion to keep him from noticing, or questioned just _what in the world_ was coming out of his _six-year-old_ mouth to get him back in-line (he was _horrible_ at acting, _god help him_ ). Of course, it was over the course of these murder mysteries that she realized that while he focused on catching the culprit, he made sure to check on Ran as well as herself for their wellbeing. He _knew_ these things were upsetting.

Then one day, Sonoko simply came to forget the difference.

She couldn't help sometimes messing with him, so when she and Ran had hit the beach (for once without him and _still_ getting into a case) she'd sent him a photo.

She had wanted to leave evidence.

It didn't work out all that well, since _something_ had happened to the photo.

Pity, she'd have to some time in the future manage another sexy-shot for him.

It seriously couldn't be any fun being stuck in a child's body with an adult mind, considering his nose-bleed reactions in response to Ran's (scantily clad or naked) body being far too comically (yet easily) spoken away.

There were times she'd remember the promise he'd forced on her like some ill-fated omen that led to his disappearance after his trip to Tropical Land with Ran.

 _"Will you promise me, if anything happened, to keep Ran happy if I'm ever away?"_

Jerk.

Of _course_ there was no way she could fulfill that promise.

Sure, she could hang out with her and talk with her, but there was a very specific Shinichi sized _hole_ in Ran's life now that a pathetic child was trying to fill.

He was doing a poor job of it.

Conan was doing the _best job he could_ of it.

Sonoko came to begrudgingly accept that.

He had slowly garnered her respect despite his shape.

She _still_ had every plan to punch him in the shin for it though.

 _Especially_ for confusing Ran and making her doubt herself when she felt she _knew_. Even _she'd_ been thrown for a loop when he re-appeared during their class play.

Whenever Ran told her about his reappearances before _and_ after that though, she was disturbed at her descriptions of his behavior.

It had already been disturbing to see him pass out after his little deduction show with Hattori Heiji, but to hear that his general health was so poor when he _did_ show up other times was… disheartening.

Just how deep and dark did things get to become a child again, and for it to be _like dieing_ to return?

 **-XXX-**

She'd been shot.

Sonoko had only ever guessed what it might be like to be shot in that weird _what if_ sort of way, but it was so, so, _so_ much worse than she'd imagined.

She had absolute respect for the kid.

Conan had been shot straight through and had kept a level head while helping the Shounen Tantei out of a tunnel while bleeding out.

She felt like crying and screaming at the same time. They were trapped.

His voice was low and comforting, "It's a clean shot through, I know it hurts but you've _got_ to bear it. We've wrapped it as best we can. I'm too small to help you run, so you need to save your energy for if we need to, because we _will_." Her was blood on his hands.

A child shouldn't be this calm. She and Ran shouldn't be hanging on his every word like this.

It was Shinichi. Of course he was calm.

She grit her teeth while trying to not cradle her leg where it was injured, opting to simply put pressure around her knee as a distraction from the pain. Taking medium sized breaths as tears rolled down her cheeks she tried to keep her senses in tact. She couldn't fall apart on them now.

She was certainly halfway there.

Ran put a comforting hand on her shoulder while speaking just as softly, "Sonoko…" she reached over and shakily wiped away her tears with a cloth, "We'll make it out. Help is coming, I was able to get a signal."

Sonoko nodded, taking in a sharp gasping breath before exhaling in a final long gust. She wasn't weak. She needed to stop crying. She was _determined to_. So she would. Makoto would be proud of her spirit.

Conan was constantly going back between her in the corner of the room, hidden behind an abandoned desk and the door. He was silent, his size lending to his stealth, never taking more than a moment before returning to their side. The intense gaze he kept giving her when checking up on her condition was far too disturbing on a child's face. It was scaring her. "Chibi."

He frowned in slight annoyance, "What?"

"You're creepy, you got that? If we don't get out of here alive I'm haunting you forever."

He blinked as Ran huffed, "Sonoko, I know you're in pain but don't blame it on Conan-kun."

She tried to relax her body against the wall, "It _hurts_."

Ran squeezed her shoulder, "I know."

Did she?

Conan took her other hand and squeezed it, a look of guilt, remorse, and finally determination on his face, "I know Sonoko-neechan. I know, but you're strong. We'll make it."

He looked her in the eyes with a face so _Shinichi_ it stole her breath away.

"We'll make it home."


End file.
